Wedding Bells Are Ringing
Last Wednesday, I slept six hours because I had to get up Thursday at 5:30 and, because I had no lessons for the proceeding two days, I couldn't sleep
On Thursday I was at a conference with the others in my group and we celebrated a birthday – again, I slept five hours.
On Friday we celebrated the going-away of another girl and again, I slept five hours.
So you can imagine my trepidation when I went to my host-brothers wedding on Saturday, weddings here being endurance contests as much as anything else and events which require a depth of energy even under the best of circumstances.
But I showed up ready to go, getting home at 7:00 Saturday evening and after waiting for a ride from my host-cousin with my host-mom and host-grandma for a while, we were finally whisked away to the mayor's office for the signing of the documents (the irony being that we waited thirty minutes to avoid a four minute walk). We showed up and there were only a handful of people there, the mayor included, and my host-brother and his bride both dressed up and looking great. The others gathered around were mainly family and the young men and women of the wedding party – a total of maybe twenty-five. There they had their vows, we drank some champagne, the parents gave some words, and then it was off to our local sanatorium located about a mile away for the real party that awaited us.
When we arrived, after taking some pictures, we were met by a crowd of about 150 people who were cheering and in a very jovial mood. At weddings here the couple usually goes in first and waits next to an arch decorated with flowers while the guests file in, one by one or in pairs, and offer their congratulations to the couple and then take their seats. It should be noted that this didn't happen until 9:30 at night and I was already dragging badly from being so tired – it took a lot of mental energy for me to stay focused and I had to draw on the people in the room to stay up.
I was placed by my host mom at a table of twenty-five people, two of whom I actually knew: my host-brothers wife's neighbor who I had spoken to twice and who once picked me up when I was trying to hitchhike, and the wife's aunt who ate dinner with us once but with whom I'd never spoken to. That was it. Thankfully though, there was a married couple to the immediate left of me who were quick to befriend me and with whom I spoke for a while. At weddings, after people have sat around and eaten for a while, people go outside to dance for an hour or two. Me being alone, I just stood and watched the dancing but actually found it entertaining – I also didn't have the physical vitality to spare for dancing, especially because we were coming up on 1:00 in the morning at this point and I still had at least five more hours to go. So I went back inside and sat alone at my table alone for a while, having a drink and trying to recover a bit, although I tried a little too hard because the next thing I new the place was full and there was the married couple sitting next to me and giving me an odd look (apparently I had said some words to them in English, making me realize that I was indeed seventy percent sleeping yet part of me was conscious of the people entering around me. I then, however, closed my eyes only to open them fifteen minutes later with my host-mom telling me not to sleep and putting a cup of coffee on the place-mat in front of me.
I woke up at about 2:00 to the start of the traditional second dinner, when the equivalent of the best man and bridesmaid walk around the room with a decorated basket, approaching all the guests who in turn give little toasts, then announced how much money they were giving the newlyweds before throwing the money into the basket. I actually had a little toast planned but a combination of my total exhaustion combined with the mass of people around me caused me to hold my tongue – when they came to me I simply threw my money in the basket and told them I had no speech. They came to me at the end and my body was like a cellphone operating on the final bar and starting to beep loudly, demanding recharging. It was 3:00 in the morning – I was dying.
But then the most remarkable thing happened: I got a second (or third or fourth) wind. From somewhere, someone, I somehow started to feel better. My mood picked up, and thoughts other than my desire to crawl to sleep somewhere were able to enter my mind. I saw a woman I knew there, my host-uncle's wife and a woman who once a week or so goes to take care of host-grandpa (who, sadly, wasn't at the wedding) – I ended up drinking and talking with her for about an hour. At that point the crowd was starting to clear out while the bride and groom engage in a tradition in which they sit on chairs and all the clothing, sheets, and other wearable things they've been give are placed on them, after which the cake is cut and given out the holders-on.
Finally, about 6:00 in the morning I was basically drained and ready to go home, waiting and waiting and wanting to do everything possible to avoid the half-hour walk home. They kept promising that we would leave and then . . . the next thing I knew it was 6:45 in the morning and I was the only one left in the building. I must have sat down to relax and like a laptop computer turning off itself when the battery gets too low, just shut down. I didn't know what to do except that which I didn't want to do at all costs – walk home. But seeing no other option, I hoofed it home, arriving at 7:28 and passing out from exhaustion at 7:30 (only to wake up at 1:30 in the afternoon). It marked a great end to an event that I had been looking forward to for well over a year.
Notes:
- Sadly, this joyous event was proceeded by a very personally sad one – the loss of my cell phone. It fell out of my pocket on the mini-bus home before the wedding and I was so busy with thoughts of the following few hours that I didn't notice until I walked through my door. I immediately went back and flagged down the driver who let me get on and search but I came up with nothing. I then went home and called myself (something I should have done right away) I heard it go right to voice-mail, meaning someone had found it and turned it off. Meaning that no-one had any intention of returning it to me.
On one hand the news was crushing – the days without a phone have been much harder than my time without a computer because gone is any communication with friends, the daily text-messages sent between us. There a few things that happen every day after which I need to tell someone but can't. But on the other hand, there are volunteers who have had computers or wallets stolen so in a way, I know it could be a lot worse. But it's still not fun. As soon as I get a new phone in eight days, I'll post my new number so that should the mood to call me strike anyone reading this, that possibility will exist.
- The conference that I wrote about at the start of this about the conference that all members were at – it was a little bittersweet, seeing as how it will be the very last time that we are all together. We spent the two days getting presentations from various Peace Corps staff and former Peace Corps volunteers who work with NGO's in Moldova, all of whom gave us information about what we can expect both in our last few months of service as well as out first few months back home.
We also had our final language exam and I got the score I expected on it, grading out at “Advanced-Mid”, the score I was hoping to get when I first found out about the scoring system. It's especially high for a Russian speaker – I've allowed myself a rare moment of pride over my accomplishment.
- Exactly three months from the day of this posting my feet will touch down in my hometown. Not that I'm counting or anything . . .
- Last Thursday, the first day of our conference, also marked the birthday of one of my best friends here, a girl celebrating her twenty-fifth year. As part of my gift to her I had my youngest classes, my fourth, fifth, and sixth graders, all make by hand cards for her with notes written inside them. I have to hand it to my kids – they did a great job and the cards were great, so great that the girl I gave them to actually teared up a little. It made me so happy with my kids that I can't describe it.
On Thursday I was at a conference with the others in my group and we celebrated a birthday – again, I slept five hours.
On Friday we celebrated the going-away of another girl and again, I slept five hours.
So you can imagine my trepidation when I went to my host-brothers wedding on Saturday, weddings here being endurance contests as much as anything else and events which require a depth of energy even under the best of circumstances.
But I showed up ready to go, getting home at 7:00 Saturday evening and after waiting for a ride from my host-cousin with my host-mom and host-grandma for a while, we were finally whisked away to the mayor's office for the signing of the documents (the irony being that we waited thirty minutes to avoid a four minute walk). We showed up and there were only a handful of people there, the mayor included, and my host-brother and his bride both dressed up and looking great. The others gathered around were mainly family and the young men and women of the wedding party – a total of maybe twenty-five. There they had their vows, we drank some champagne, the parents gave some words, and then it was off to our local sanatorium located about a mile away for the real party that awaited us.
When we arrived, after taking some pictures, we were met by a crowd of about 150 people who were cheering and in a very jovial mood. At weddings here the couple usually goes in first and waits next to an arch decorated with flowers while the guests file in, one by one or in pairs, and offer their congratulations to the couple and then take their seats. It should be noted that this didn't happen until 9:30 at night and I was already dragging badly from being so tired – it took a lot of mental energy for me to stay focused and I had to draw on the people in the room to stay up.
I was placed by my host mom at a table of twenty-five people, two of whom I actually knew: my host-brothers wife's neighbor who I had spoken to twice and who once picked me up when I was trying to hitchhike, and the wife's aunt who ate dinner with us once but with whom I'd never spoken to. That was it. Thankfully though, there was a married couple to the immediate left of me who were quick to befriend me and with whom I spoke for a while. At weddings, after people have sat around and eaten for a while, people go outside to dance for an hour or two. Me being alone, I just stood and watched the dancing but actually found it entertaining – I also didn't have the physical vitality to spare for dancing, especially because we were coming up on 1:00 in the morning at this point and I still had at least five more hours to go. So I went back inside and sat alone at my table alone for a while, having a drink and trying to recover a bit, although I tried a little too hard because the next thing I new the place was full and there was the married couple sitting next to me and giving me an odd look (apparently I had said some words to them in English, making me realize that I was indeed seventy percent sleeping yet part of me was conscious of the people entering around me. I then, however, closed my eyes only to open them fifteen minutes later with my host-mom telling me not to sleep and putting a cup of coffee on the place-mat in front of me.
I woke up at about 2:00 to the start of the traditional second dinner, when the equivalent of the best man and bridesmaid walk around the room with a decorated basket, approaching all the guests who in turn give little toasts, then announced how much money they were giving the newlyweds before throwing the money into the basket. I actually had a little toast planned but a combination of my total exhaustion combined with the mass of people around me caused me to hold my tongue – when they came to me I simply threw my money in the basket and told them I had no speech. They came to me at the end and my body was like a cellphone operating on the final bar and starting to beep loudly, demanding recharging. It was 3:00 in the morning – I was dying.
But then the most remarkable thing happened: I got a second (or third or fourth) wind. From somewhere, someone, I somehow started to feel better. My mood picked up, and thoughts other than my desire to crawl to sleep somewhere were able to enter my mind. I saw a woman I knew there, my host-uncle's wife and a woman who once a week or so goes to take care of host-grandpa (who, sadly, wasn't at the wedding) – I ended up drinking and talking with her for about an hour. At that point the crowd was starting to clear out while the bride and groom engage in a tradition in which they sit on chairs and all the clothing, sheets, and other wearable things they've been give are placed on them, after which the cake is cut and given out the holders-on.
Finally, about 6:00 in the morning I was basically drained and ready to go home, waiting and waiting and wanting to do everything possible to avoid the half-hour walk home. They kept promising that we would leave and then . . . the next thing I knew it was 6:45 in the morning and I was the only one left in the building. I must have sat down to relax and like a laptop computer turning off itself when the battery gets too low, just shut down. I didn't know what to do except that which I didn't want to do at all costs – walk home. But seeing no other option, I hoofed it home, arriving at 7:28 and passing out from exhaustion at 7:30 (only to wake up at 1:30 in the afternoon). It marked a great end to an event that I had been looking forward to for well over a year.
Notes:
- Sadly, this joyous event was proceeded by a very personally sad one – the loss of my cell phone. It fell out of my pocket on the mini-bus home before the wedding and I was so busy with thoughts of the following few hours that I didn't notice until I walked through my door. I immediately went back and flagged down the driver who let me get on and search but I came up with nothing. I then went home and called myself (something I should have done right away) I heard it go right to voice-mail, meaning someone had found it and turned it off. Meaning that no-one had any intention of returning it to me.
On one hand the news was crushing – the days without a phone have been much harder than my time without a computer because gone is any communication with friends, the daily text-messages sent between us. There a few things that happen every day after which I need to tell someone but can't. But on the other hand, there are volunteers who have had computers or wallets stolen so in a way, I know it could be a lot worse. But it's still not fun. As soon as I get a new phone in eight days, I'll post my new number so that should the mood to call me strike anyone reading this, that possibility will exist.
- The conference that I wrote about at the start of this about the conference that all members were at – it was a little bittersweet, seeing as how it will be the very last time that we are all together. We spent the two days getting presentations from various Peace Corps staff and former Peace Corps volunteers who work with NGO's in Moldova, all of whom gave us information about what we can expect both in our last few months of service as well as out first few months back home.
We also had our final language exam and I got the score I expected on it, grading out at “Advanced-Mid”, the score I was hoping to get when I first found out about the scoring system. It's especially high for a Russian speaker – I've allowed myself a rare moment of pride over my accomplishment.
- Exactly three months from the day of this posting my feet will touch down in my hometown. Not that I'm counting or anything . . .
- Last Thursday, the first day of our conference, also marked the birthday of one of my best friends here, a girl celebrating her twenty-fifth year. As part of my gift to her I had my youngest classes, my fourth, fifth, and sixth graders, all make by hand cards for her with notes written inside them. I have to hand it to my kids – they did a great job and the cards were great, so great that the girl I gave them to actually teared up a little. It made me so happy with my kids that I can't describe it.
posted by Andy Buchanan at 12:52 AM
1 Comments:
Andy,
Rats ! We missed one wedding by a day and now reading your description made me all the more disappointed that our plane flight was delayed. I don't think Rob's wedding will be similar, with all of the ersatz Norwegians invited it will probably have tables of people looking like they are at a wake, and wondering why anyone else would be trying to have fun.
The countdown is serious now, every few weeks someome you've grown to know fairly well will be leaving for the USA. 'Can't say it is exactly the same place you left, espceially in a presidential election year with all that that circus entails.
The temperatures there must be climbimg by now while here the coolness persists, frost warnings across most of the top half of the state were issued for Tuesday night. I've turned off the heat so it is cool in the morning !
Dad
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